Weekly Bravo Cocktail Party: November 13

It was busy week in Bravo world, especially with the premiere of Salt Lake City. I’m excited to have a new franchise and new energy, and I love the more diverse cast that they have put together, but I definitely also have concerns. My main one is that I love the cities where the cast is smart and witty, the quips and the fights flow quickly, but then people are able to move on and get over it. NYC, Potomac and Atlanta have that in spades. Based on the fights that are already brewing, this cast seems like the type that’s going to hold onto a grudge and never let it go, and that definitely concerns me (please see Shannon and Braunwyn’s current fight or the last two seasons of Beverly Hills). However, they did manage to cram a vow renewal, cosmetic surgery, stripper poles, Hawaiian dancers, hiking, three fast food joints, talking to teenagers about STDs, and being married to your step-grandfather all into one episode, so no one can say that these ladies aren’t putting in the work, and for that I salute them! Now, should we see who I would invite to my party this week?

Photo by Bravo. Shannon zooming around in this small car brought me so much joy.

Who’s Not Invited:

Wendy: We know you have four degrees! It’s just getting awkward to keep bringing it up at this point.

Michael Darby: Still making Ashley cry from across the Atlantic ocean. Ugh.

Kelly: Her lack of kindness towards Braunwyn isn’t surprising but it’s still off putting.

T Rav: He isn’t a cast member at this point, but seriously? He gets a girl pregnant and she’s seven months along but he won’t tell the mother of his children who is currently living with him and who he’s hooked up at least once in this time period? She has to have her lawyer talk to him to get a straight answer. That is some kind of crazy.

Mary: Besides the fact that she’s married to her late grandmother’s husband, can we talk about the strangeness of her being a pastor, or should I say, the first lady of the church, since Mary thinks the word pastor sounds like old people? She has literally no empathy for Jen being upset about her aunt losing both her legs and says that the aunt should have taken better care of her health. She also doesn’t get why Jen’s offended by that and by Mary saying that she smelled like a hospital. Doesn’t it seem like the head of a church should be able summon some kind of superficial concern for others? And we know her church is successful because all we hear about is her designer clothes, which was also very strange to me. I’m definitely intrigued by what’s going on there…

Jen Shah: I was definitely concerned about the STD advice that she gave her sons, but they seem sweet and like they have good heads on their shoulders, so I’m going to assume that was vamping for the cameras and not the way they normally interact. I’m torn on Jen because she seems to be a good friend and I like how she stuck up for Heather but is also able to get along with everyone. I didn’t love her crazy party behavior and the way she claimed that it was a party for Meredith but the whole party was about her and had nothing to do with Meredith. It’s going to get old fast if she has this much ego in every episode.

Lisa: Adults who claim to never cook drive me crazy. As did her claim that New Yorkers never wear short dresses and tall heels (has she ever watched RHONY?). But it was really her rude dismissal of Heather that made her look bad-I think both those ladies have a lot of insecurities that this fight is bringing to the surface. Although I do love some passive aggressive mean girl behavior in my housewives-it feels so high school and fun, now that I’m safely an adult watching it on tv.

Photo by Bravo. We got to know Leva a lot better this episode and I loved it.

Who Made the Guest List:

Craig: Is he the new narrator now that Shannon is gone? I don’t hate that! It does say something about the current cast that Craig is out voice of reason, however…

Danni: Guys, why does Danni put up with these crazies? She’s the best at bringing out the good side of people like Shep and Kathryn, while also dressing amazingly for Leva’s party and seeming like a fun person to hang out with.

Gina: I wanted to cry when she was talking about how traumatic the domestic abuse situation was for her, and how she was tempted to not give a victim’s statement for the trial because she and Matt were in a better place now. I thought it was so brave that she decided to go through with it to help herself heal and to show her children the importance of being strong for yourself. She was also so kind to Braunwyn and did her best to work through their issues and support Braunwyn’s journey.

Emily: I love the idea of a swimsuit line for her and that she was encouraging Gina and Braunwyn to make up.

Leva: Her party was gorgeous-the food, the decor, her outfit-I wanted to be there and eat some of that rice! I loved seeing her mother and getting to know more about her background as well.

Heather: When we met her at her plastic surgery center, I was initially not sure if I‘d like her. However, she seemed relatively sane and self-aware compared to the other ladies, and she was a good friend to Jen and supportive cousin to Whitney and I really felt for her when Lisa pretended that she didn’t know her back in college-so rude!

Whitney: It says a lot about the cast of SLC that the wife who swung around her basement stripper pole in front of her Mormon family at the vow renewal ceremony that she had with the husband that she got together with when they were both married to other people seems like one of the more normal cast members?

Meredith and Brooks: I liked Meredith’s dry sense of humor and I loved her son Brooks. I also like her relaxed attitude about Jen pretending to throw her a birthday party and then actually making it all about Jen. She seemed totally cool with it, which was more mature than I’ve ever been about my birthday parties and I was impressed, especially since her husband wasn’t in town to celebrate her birthday with her. He seems to spend a good amount of time in Chicago, which makes me nervous for them, but luckily she has her hilarious son, Brooks, to keep her company.