This week on Bravo, it was all about two major showdowns. Denise vs the Brandi rumors and Ramona vs Leah. As usual, Ramona came out the loser in her attempt to take down Leah, who cannot be stopped this season and comes out of every incident smelling like roses. The situation with Denise was more complex, and I would say that there are no winners there-it was honestly more depressing than dramatic. Let’s break it down further and see who at least got an invite to our cocktail party this week, where we’ll be making ceviche and drinking Cokes with a splash of rose.

Who’s Not Invited:

Jessica and Rob: I usually love a boat romance, but these two are such a snooze fest, right? They don’t seem to have any drama, they just hug in the laundry room when they should be working and give each other a peck before sleeping in their respective bunks. I feel like they should either be fighting or hot and heavy, otherwise what are we getting from this? Healthy relationships are so not interesting…

The Menu for the Las Vegas Party: Guys, when Hannah and Kiko started going through their idea of Vegas food, I knew it was going to be bad. I have never known Hannah to lead a chef astray in menu planning, so I think it’s a real indication of how miserable she is on the boat this season. She doesn’t even have it in her to fight with Bugsy or yell at Jessica. When she suggested chicken fingers and nachos for a guest dinner, it was clear that she’s ready to hang up her walkie talkie and move on. I love Hannah, so seeing her like this is hard, and in the previews for next week, it looks like it’s only going to get worse.

Teddi: How did Teddi draw the straw to be the one to share all of the deets from the conversation with Brandi? Is that Kyle working behind the scenes, trying to take down Denise and give Teddi a storyline? Or is because Kyle is so conflict avoidant and Teddi was actually so stressed by having this information that she couldn’t help but blurt it out? Kyle and Rinna were smart enough to not be one who said it to the group on camera. Eesh.

Ramona: Let’s look closely at the dynamic between Ramona and Leah to see if we can make sense of this fight: we’ve got some layers of Ramona’s jealousy for Leah being hotter and younger, Ramona’s disdain for Leah’s less affluent lifestyle, and some mother/daughter psychological drama that they’re both bringing to the table from their strained relationships with their biological mothers. It’s hard to even understand why Ramona was so mad at Leah (she clearly didn’t understand that Leah was wearing a bodysuit under that dress that kept any actually bits from being exposed), when Leah was part of a grinding pile at her party, and she’s giving Sonja a free pass for what was much wilder behavior. Ramona wasn’t even able to explain to Leah why she was so mad when the other women finally forced a confrontation in Mexico, and was forced to retreat to her room before she got to enjoy the ceviche.

Who Made the Guest List:

 Bugsy and Alex: I liked their awkward, weird flirty dynamic this week!

The Guests on the Wellington: Are these some of the cooler and more fun guests they’ve ever had? 

Erika and Garcelle: I was very into both of their looks for the Rome trip. Garcelle’s travel day outfit and sight seeing outfit were both winners for me, and I like Erika’s all white outfit and hat and her glam Italian widow look for dinner.

Sutton and Dorit: From the previews, it looked like the restaurant scene was going to be everyone ganging up on Denise, so I liked seeing the way that Dorit and Sutton both questioned the validity of what Brandi had said and made it more of conversation than an attack. Dorit especially deflected some of the heat from Denise, and I think that’s one of the reasons why Denise was able to stay at the table and not run away.

Denise: Last week, when Brandi was telling her version of the events, her pain was so palpable to me that it made her very credible. This week, I could also see how much this conversation upset Denise, and it made me believe her too. I truly don’t know where to come down on this and I think it’s a lose/lose situation for everyone. If I had to guess, I would say that there’s probably a kernel of truth in what Brandi said, and Denise probably did vent to her about the other women and they did get a little frisky, but Denise never thought that Brandi would blow the whole thing out of proportion and make it public and more intentional than it was.

Dorinda: We got to see the good side of Dorinda this week, and I was so happy that she was back! I loved seeing her try to broker a peace between Ramona and Leah, helping Leah get dressed and generally being a reasonable person.

Leah: She can do no wrong this season, don’t you think?